Tick Tock On The Clock

Tonight I find myself rediscovering the ideals of words like intentionality and discipline.

These are often lacking in my life. I find that I am often moved more by emotion or sentiment than substance. I am praying that as I partake in Lent this year that God will shift some priorities in my life.

Let's be honest, I have all too often sold out who I am, deep in my inner man, for the comforts of self. These comforts, sadly, include food, and forms of entertainment that rob me of my time with Jesus. Often I am lost between running after God and neglecting my physical man, or running after physical fitness and neglecting my spiritual man. I struggle to put both together, and I believe this is because my motivations and desires for one or the other aren't grounded in Christ.

I have found that I am wasting my life in everyway, and this of course is not in the David Crowder, Worship Music, Waste Your Life before God type of way.

I long to be a man of discipline, and a man of great character. My flesh often gets in the way.

I suppose I reflect on this the most when I think about my job. I LOVE my job. I enjoy every aspect of it, even the challenges of planning and accounting which I generally dislike. Counseling and Ministry are the highpoints of my job and I simply cannot get enough of PT.

I know deep down inside of me is a man that is strong, determined and rooted in Christ.

For some reason, my heart won't let me be satisfied with not attempting to train and push myself to my max potential physically. I am often shocked when I ask fellow soldiers and offices if they want to go to Ranger School or prepare themselves for special forces work. I just can't believe the answers I hear when I ask that question. I suppose I ask it, because if I was in shape enough to go, there is nothing on earth that would hold me back from going. I believe, after talking with soldiers that have a strong distaste for this type of thing, that this is a passion that God has placed in my heart.... the only trick is being focused enough on a daily basis to accomplish my physical goals so I can go. I lost 80lbs just to get in the Army, but in the end that isn't good enough for me. There is so much more that I could be and I am my own worst enemy in this regard. I think I would go through the gas chamber a hundred times over to be able to pin the tab on, but then again, the great question of "WHY" comes up...

My identity has to be locked into Christ. I believe however I can be locked into Christ and still push myself to be in a position to minister to "the best of the best" by going through SFQC or RANGER school.

Obviously more factors go into this personal goal than just my own ambitions. My wife and baby on the way are a priority and I cannot take this road without their support, but I KNOW Soldiers of this caliber are in desperate need of a Savior, precisely because they can do so much on their own, they are not used to relying on GOD.

Having said all this, I am tremendously proud to be in the Unit I am serving in and I thank the LORD JESUS CHRIST that I have such great leadership to work for, and great Soldiers to serve. The best part of my day is talking to Soldiers. I love this! I can't imagine doing anything else, but the more I serve in Garrison, the more I realize my heart is out in the field, not stuck behind a desk or in the COF.

Well, enough talk for this entry. Our Unit heads out to the snowy fields of the Colorado Rocky Mountains for 3 weeks of training. I am pumped to be able to minister to Soldiers and have an opportunity to preach.

Time to get to bed, and pack for my up and coming time in the field.

Till Next Time, Keep JESUS the MAIN THING and enjoy the WARMTH that so many Soldiers give up everyday so they can defend our nation and her citizens freedom!!

Thanks for Reading...